i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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