the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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