Jerry, you need to find god
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
