It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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