i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
