My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Randomize
