problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
