She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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