So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
