Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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