I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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