I'm jealous of your bromance
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize