You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
