if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
