and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
