I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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