Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
