My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
