fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize