I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Naked Twister starts at high noon
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
