I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
My dick has a subreddit
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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