in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
