Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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