The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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