____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Randomize
