Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize