When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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