im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize
