some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
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Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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