You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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