Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
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There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
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Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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