Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
