Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
