You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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