Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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