it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
