Moan for me like Helen Keller
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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