Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
