come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.