I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.