careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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