Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
