this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize