i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
We got so high we made milksteak
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
