I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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