how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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