he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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