Only a mothe r could love this liver
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize