I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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