why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
