I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
